We never marry our organizing soul mate. It’s like opposites attract for organizing. One partner is all about minimalism and one is about consumerism. One partner has ODC and one partner has ADHD. One partner loves getting organized and one is cluttered with paper. Clutter causes a LOT of stress in relationships and about one third of us avoid going home to our clutter. It can cause the end of relationships too. Organizing as a couple makes a difference in your every day life and your relationship with your partner. Organizing for couples can make each day happier.
It’s all about respect.
- Refer to your partner’s belongings with a respectful tone and with respect to the stuff.
- We all have something that is special to us. Every one of us has prize possessions.
- Respect is the bottom line for all relationships that work.
Being organized looks like many many different things to many different people. But we can come together when we recognize how important it is to respect each other.
- Talk through difference in organizing by coaching each other.
- Use a respectful tone referring to each other’s belongings.
- Acknowledge the different backgrounds we all come from to create order in our lives.
Collaborate about your goals about organizing, timeliness and paper management.
- Take time each week to talk about being organized. Start with baby steps.
- Support each other in creating order in your home by partnering on tasks and responsibilities.
- Set standards and create charts that help everyone stay connected about their goals.
Make action happen
- Be specific about work habits. Specify what tasks will be done when and what “done” looks like.
- Work together each day on getting items back to where they belong. Have time together to get this done.
- Acknowledge successes. Successes create bigger successes.
- Start with your own organizing. Start with your closet, timeliness or other spaces. Help you partner enjoy less stress by seeing your stress being less.
It’s not easy but couples working together for organizing success create happy relationships. Be the model for your partner by starting first with your clutter, then helping them. Organizing for couples is hard, but yields great reward.
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