Happy Holidays
It’s the most wonderful time of the year!
Wishing you wonderful holiday memories and time with those you love.
The Benefits of Gratitude during the Holidays
The holiday of Thanksgiving brings gratitude into focus. We see ourselves around the table sharing what we are grateful for. All too often, even the day after Thanksgiving, we are too busy to experience the gratitude we remarked on throughout the holiday season and beyond. Make your holiday especially meaningful with a gratitude practice.
Benefits of Gratitude
In positive psychology research, gratitude is strongly and consistently associated with greater happiness. Gratitude helps people feel more positive emotions, relish good experiences, improve their health, deal with adversity, and build strong relationships. A gratitude practice boosts your immune system, improves mental health, and creates resilience.
Gratitude during the holiday season
Throughout the holiday season, create a gratitude practice that includes recognizing the positive aspects of your life and that impact.
Here are a few ways to practice during the holidays:
- write a short note in your journal using holiday color gel pens
- notice the smells of the holidays and what those evoke
- text someone as they come to mind and use holiday emojis
- do a little unexpected for someone who makes your day easier every day, such a kind word of appreciation
- pray for those in your community and family
- write a card expressing what is special to someone who you are close to and have not expressed regularly
- slow your pace to be able to appreciate the season
Practice gratitude with those around you with these ideas:
- gather your family or friends each evening during dinner and talk about one thing you are grateful for today
- place a gratitude jar in your kitchen with a pen and slips of paper so that each person can add to the jar each day during the holidays
- walk and talk with your family, friends, and colleagues sharing what you are grateful for today
- say thank you and explain why you are grateful to colleagues at work
- notice other’s strengths and “superpowers” authentically
Gratitude moving into the new year
While the holidays seem too busy, it is the best time to experience gratitude. Take the next step into the new year with a gratitude routine. This new habit will bring you the joy, connections, and health you want.
Practicing Routines during the Holidays
Holidays disrupt our routines with extra tasks to do and more events and parties to attend. We get off track with our daily self-care of bedtime, healthy eating, and mindfulness. Practicing routines during the holidays is most important because our routines keep life moving smoothly. Here are strategies on how to keep your routines while you enjoy the holiday season.
Make it easy
Rely on your trusted tools to help you and make routines easy. That lie we all tell ourselves, I don’t need to write it down because I will remember, especially applies during the holidays. Charts, planners, and dry-erase boards are our visual way to track our routines. We all need a road map so make it easy on yourself to chart your progress and keep on track. It is especially important to prioritize your activities and tasks for yourself and your family.
Prioritize wellness
Prioritizing always helps you stay on top of your routines. Mental well-being and physical wellness are important to enjoying the holiday season. You can rethink ways to include exercise in your day by walking stairs instead of the elevator, exercising with a quick class online, taking a walk to see holiday lights, and being sure to move hourly. Mental well-being can include setting boundaries for yourself with respect to holiday activities. Boundaries like how late you stay at a party and how many parties to attend help you stay true to your routines.
Keep it simple sweetie
It is tempting to overschedule your day to add in extra tasks and activities. Instead, look at the regular rhythm of your day and add simple bookends to each part of your day. These bookends or stopping points coincide with your regular routine. Keeping it simple so that you have the same important pauses that keep you in line with your routines.
Mealtimes and bedtimes are examples of simple routines to keep. Have regular meals that fit into your day. That might be breakfast, lunch, and dinner, or a series of meals with intermittent fasting. Keep your schedule to fuel your body. Determine a bedtime for you to ensure adequate rest so that you can be most productive. Your routine can be this simple during these busy times.
You might ask, what about all the extra tasks and activities fitting in? Keeping your health, wellness, and productivity going is foundational to your holiday fun. Adjust a little of your basic routine as needed, but remember to keep it going.
Really! Happy Holidays with ADHD
The joy of the holiday season can be overshadowed by chaotic, frazzled, over-committed holidays. It is tempting to enjoy all the delights of the season, especially for those with ADHD. To really enjoy your holiday, it helps by setting up strategies for organization and time management. Now is the time to set up systems that empower you and your family throughout the holidays
Create a holiday notebook
Tired of reinventing your holiday activities each year? It is time to start a holiday notebook. In the notebook, create these tabbed pocket dividers with these topics:
- Calendars for this year and the previous year’s activities including holiday traditions
- Gift closet inventory
- Gift list for family, friends, and work
- Tipping list for family hair, nails, and other service providers
- Holiday cards from prior years and for this year
- Vendor list for holiday cards, photographer, ornament purchases, and more
- Budget
- Meals, menus, and recipes
- Décor and photos from previous years’ decorating
Keeping all this information together helps you save time and energy, as well as stay organized. You may decide from year to year to discontinue one or more activities. Keep it in your notebook for future reference.
Host a family meeting
A family meeting brings everyone together before the holiday season. Post a family calendar for everyone to write dates of upcoming events and parties. Discuss everyone’s favorite activity and be sure that one activity is included on the calendar. Host this meeting the week of Thanksgiving to be sure you are on top of all dates.
Make a list and check it twice
Make a list of everyone’s activities and tasks for the holidays. Now prioritize that list. Knowing what is coming up and deciding what is most important to each family member and yourself helps us be realistic and also have fun. Add these to a calendar to see when activities and events overlap. Start early with this and host a family meeting weekly to be sure to stay on track.
Tracking Rudolf and Santa
We are all ordering online, tracking gifts, and praying for their arrival. Use a dedicated email address for shopping and a folder in your inbox for receipts. Having one place to look for these details saves time and keeps you organized.
Gifts, gifts, and gifts
Getting stuck in finding the perfect gift? Move forward with gift cards, experiences, or a small something that you especially love. There is a reason why Oprah’s favorite gifts are given. Choose a gift-giving strategy that works for you and your budget. Kids and teens love gift cards they can use as they like. Adults appreciate that little gift of self-care such as lip balm. Families love time together at a special event. Being thoughtful is what is most important, not the gift itself.
Holidays are for everyone, including you as head holiday merry-maker. We get over the top with activities and fatigue. Keep routines and self-care a priority to make the most of your holiday joy!
Grateful. Thankful. Blessed.
I am grateful, thankful, and blessed by all our connections this year. Wishing you an abundance of blessings this holiday season and into the new year!
ADHD 2022 International Conference on ADHD
My work with my clients is my priority. And also my professional development, learning, and training. Continuing education and career training allow me to develop new skills, stay up-to-date on current trends, and advance our work together in sessions. It is my commitment to be on the leading edge of training for our work together.
Learning from ADHD experts
Over the last three months, I have attended seminars on ADHD and anxiety, addiction, and oppositional defiance through ADDA-SR. Last summer, I was privileged to attend the ADHD Intensive. This month I attended the International Conference on ADHD. What did I learn?
- A strong foundation and commitment to self-care prepare you best for every other part of your work, managing your home and relationships.
- Coaching is a positive strategy for processing information and creating strategies for home, work, and life.
- Whether you are a child or an adult with ADHD, there are ways to make change happen when you are ready.
- Setting strong positive boundaries helps us navigate difficult relationships. These boundaries include both options that are desirable and non-negotiable.
- More research on ADHD is needed to help with assessments and medications for ADHD.
This information reinforces much of what I know to be true. However, taking these experts’ information to my clients is my next step with my coaching and hands-on work.
Collective joy in a community of learning
Conferences, Summits, and community learning are coming back after uncertain times. For me, it is a true joy to sit and listen with my colleagues in person to experts and authors. Taking notes, reading materials, and discussing information bring life to learning. I call this collective joy in that we are all together learning and engaging.
There is so much joy in meeting new colleagues and reconnecting with my peers. Time spent together in person, experiencing conferences together, discussing our work, and meeting new people bring purpose to my work. I love connecting with my colleagues who work in this specialty.
I am grateful for the opportunities for professional development this year and going forward. It is who I am to continue learning, seeking information, and sharing that with everyone around me.
ADHD Friendly Tips for Connection
The value of connection is priceless for all of us. During the pandemic, relationships are what kept us moving forward. For those with ADHD, connection is the solution for support. That connection includes work with colleagues, daily life with family and friends, and those around us in our environment. There are many ways to do this, and here is a short ADHD- friendly list to help you. We know that these connections empower us and enhance our lives.
Double up
Make connections by doubling up on both connection and another positive activity. Take a walk or an exercise class with a friend. You are getting exercise and connecting.
Do it now
Thinking of a friend? Send a quick text just to say hello.
Dinner time
Work to have a regular dinner time multiple times a week and always once on the weekend. Do not worry so much about what you are serving as making sure everyone comes to the table to talk. Talk about the highs and lows of the day to know more about everyone’s emotions that day.
Family meeting
Family meetings promote communication and organization. Host a weekly meeting for your family to talk about calendars, responsibilities, and upcoming holidays.
Communicate gratitude
Sadly, and rarely, do we hear about the beauty of a friendship. Share the impact that person has on you and the strengths of that person when you connect. Being grateful moves us toward happiness. Be someone else’s cheerleader today.
Remember a birthday
Just a quick text or a snail mail card makes a difference for you and your connection. Keep a list of birthdays and a stash of cards to send at the beginning or end of the month for all the birthdays coming up or just passed.
Play games online
Online games connect you to others with the same interest and in the global community. Join in the games with your kiddos.
Join a book club
Book clubs are where people are enjoying books and connecting.
Connect through spirituality
Our communities are filled with those practicing spirituality at temples, synagogues, mosques, and churches. Reach out to those with similar paths, attend, and join a community. These foundations have many activities to connect to others regularly.
Use social media wisely
Connect with others on social media positively. Often there are groups to join with common interests. Set a time to sparingly join online to prevent hyperfocus.
Volunteer
We make connections when helping others. Volunteer and do good while connecting.
Connection is so important that it should be a time block on your calendar. Take time this week for one small step.
ADHD Friendly Tips for How to Declutter
Has a space become chaotic and cluttered in your home? Are you keeping a lot of unnecessary items just in case with no place to store these? Has clutter been keeping you in a funk? These are some of the challenges of ADHD and organization. Here are some tips for how to declutter with an ADHD-friendly approach.
Getting ready
You have been thinking a lot about decluttering and have yet to start. It is overwhelming because you are not sure where to start or what to let go of. Start with what will create some urgency for you. That’s a deadline! Aim for an important date with a holiday, family event, or company coming. A deadline will make this task a real activity.
Gather your stuff together
Marie Kondo suggests gathering your same items together to be ready to declutter. I agree! Group items by category in order to see how many you have in order to make a decision on which items to keep. Gather your stuff by category no matter where it is currently being stored. Start with a large group to gather, such as clothes, so you can make a big impact.
Make it fun
Organizing with a team or using an “organizing playlist” brings joy to your work. Find what is fun for you!
Conquering the clutter
- Get going! Use a timer to set the amount of time you are working.
- Make it a manageable task. Break your decluttering into chunks of work that work with your schedule. That could mean 15-minute organizing bursts too.
- Here are twelve rules that my colleagues and I have shared about decluttering. These rules include rules for emotions such as do I love this item, physical space such as large items first, or a timeline with how recently did you wear or use the item.
Set up a system that works for you
Your goal should be not only to declutter but also to create a storage spot (“home”) for each category. That storage depends on your strengths. If you are a highly visual person, make sure your system plays well with your system. Lists and labels empower this strength. An auditory learner might talk through the system as it is being created. A kinesthetic learner might set up a system that includes movement and physical processes. Each of these systems amplifies the learning style and maintains the system.
Keep your system intact
The most difficult part of organizing is keeping it going. Maintain your space by setting up routines that support your decluttering. Routines for laundry and trash pick up keep your space tidy and organized. Set up a plan and a time frame for how often you will declutter, since organizing is a journey that goes on and on and stuff keeps coming in. Having a plan for your ongoing decluttering will keep your space in balance.
Decluttering and editing end when it is easy to find the items in your house which make you happy. Letting go of what is bogging you down, taking more energy, and taking time away will be your ultimate goal.
ADHD Friendly Tips for Successful Family Meetings
Family meetings are a part of weekly organizing and productivity. Communicating what is coming up, preparing for activities and academics, and discussing family engagement are key reasons to be sure you host your meeting. At times the meeting gets bogged down or skipped entirely. Here are ideas on how to keep your family meeting moving forward and valuable.
Create a consistent agenda
Every meeting needs a great agenda. That is true for your family meeting. According to Psychology Today, here are some valuable topics.
- What happened last week and how did it go
- What’s happening this week and future/holiday plans
- Old stuff that needs a family decision
- New stuff that needs a family decision
- Money stuff
- Family stuff
- Taking care of our stuff
Pro tip: If your family loses interest, shorten the agenda to three topics.
Keep it short
Every meeting becomes yawn-worthy when it takes too long. You, your partner, and all your family will appreciate brevity. Know the meeting priorities, keep a high level, and use visual aids as needed for your meeting.
Pro tip: Play Beat the Clock to energize your meeting. Set the timer and keep your session ahead of schedule. Everyone will stay on track with this tip.
Add interest and fun
Just the word meeting can make this time together less fun. Shake it up with fun! Fun can mean a special dessert or a family activity that concludes the meeting.
Pro tip: Use wacky ways to add fun, including Crazy Hats or a Walk and Talk meeting. You can meet at different locations inside and outside your home.
Schedule regularly
Consistent family meetings help everyone maintain consistent communication. When you host this meeting weekly, you have more up-to-date information and better communication. Find the best time to meet and meet at that time regularly.
Pro tip: You may need to try different times of the week to meet or rotate the days of the week. The goal is to meet weekly.
Rotate responsibilities
Share the responsibilities of leadership with your family. You are building leadership with your children leading the meeting. One person can be a scribe to add information to the family calendar. When you share the responsibilities, kids also have more buy-in for the meeting. Your kids enjoy the fun of being in charge. One person can be the time keeper to be sure the meeting starts and ends on time.
Pro tip: Establish a pattern to share the roles between your family so everyone knows the expectations and when roles will change.
Always remember that the goal of your family meeting is to connect. No matter if you complete the agenda or have an agreement on the next family event, you are modeling and nurturing connection.
ADHD Friendly Tips for Self Care
Self-care is important for all of us and most especially those with ADHD. Strategies for sleep, exercise, diet, and collaboration support and strengthen successful lifestyles. Even more so, there are other aspects of self-care that empower you. ADHD symptoms and associated stressors can be helped with attention to rejuvenation and
Acknowledging the value of self-care
Self-care as a sanity saver and self-preservation tool? Yes! Self-care helps us be resilient, use our energy well, and manage our emotions. Daily self-care is about practical actions that afford you more capability and capacity to focus, work, and connect. This is done best by prioritizing self-care and establishing a structure throughout the day, week and month.
Structure for daily self-care is like other routines in our lives. It can be a time block for mindfulness or exercise. Or it could be weekly meal plan deliveries. Structure and habits are foundations set into place.
If you see obstacles to self-care, it is often because of boundaries. Self-care can also be staying in and heading to bed early, asking for what you need, and asking for help. This is where knowing ourselves well plays a big role. Each of us has different needs. Having strong boundaries helps you prioritize your time for you. Too many projects, too many activities, and too much “saying yes” means that your self-care will diminish. Feeling overwhelmed means you are in need of self-care.
Healthy self-care categories
Self-care extends to many areas in life and lifestyle.
- Physical health self-care includes not only a good night’s rest, exercise, and a healthy diet. It also includes regular doctor’s visits, therapy, coaching, and possibly nutritionist visits.
- Connection self-care includes fostering positive relationships with family, friends, and colleagues.
- Organizational self-care includes establishing an organized environment, keeping up with finances, and maintaining good routines with laundry.
You may have good self-care established in one area and a gap in others. Focus on strengthening one area in one small way and you continue with your other areas.
Creating self-care strategies
As with all routines, start small in creating self-care strategies. Knowing what is best for your self-care includes learning education. You might attend a webinar about a topic before strategizing how to include it in your daily routine. Plan out your day and write a checklist that includes self-care. Start working with a coach or certified professional organizer to help you be accountable for your new routine. Make small, specific, changes with dates and timelines to reinforce your success.
My motto for all my clients is to build a bigger team first. Find an exercise class to join or switch up exercise classes to keep engaged. Meal plan and prep with one of your family or bring in meal prep boxes. Build a care team of physician, psychiatrist, a coach, and other assistants. Each member of your team helps reinforce your goals and care. Your team offers support with positive encouragement and loving accountability.
Practicing self-care and self-compassion
Creating new routines can take from 21 days to 254 days, much longer than what we think should happen.
Being graceful with yourself as you take on new self-care means giving self-compassion. Not only is building self-care a lengthy process, but it can also evaporate as quickly. Keep the momentum going by keeping it simple. Complex self-care requires a lot of juggling. Freshen up self-care by changing up exercise and diet. Know the value of taking time off to reset. It is not easy but worth the effort.
We specialize in working with ADD/ADHD clients. Whether in your home or your office, we motivate, empower and affirm our clients in their quest for organizing and productivity! 