Family Traditions and Organizing

/0 Comments/in , , /by

 

family traditions and organizing

It was Friday night and my son called.  “Mom, do you have the skewers to roast marshmallows”?

 

Let me tell you about my family and one of our family traditions.  My son, in his thirties, married and 3 children, remembers when he and his sister were in elementary and middle school, we would roast marshmallows in the fireplace.  We had special skewers we used for our roasting.  My son wanted to use these with his family for their first marshmallow roast in their new home.

 

Back to the request! In the kitchen, in the barbeque spot, were the roasting skewers.  He came, took the skewers to their new home, and their family continued our family tradition.

 

What is most important to me is creating and preserving family traditions.  Whether it is sitting down to a family meal together, or having cream puffs every Christmas, this is my priority.  Having the “stuff” that connects to the meaning of these traditions makes it easy for me to make decisions on what to keep.

 

I recently decluttered in the kitchen. Letting go of the skewers never came to mind.  I did bless others with a soup tureen (wedding gift, never used in 27 years), coffee cups (from my mom, but seldom used), bread baskets (we already have plenty) and extra utensils not used.   The skewers are in a seldom used spot, but one I could easily access.

 

Always, I want to encourage you to prioritize what matters most to you.  It is vital to how you live your best life, making good decisions about what is around you and how you use your time.  Begin by reflecting and creating awareness, then write down your priorities to have clarity throughout the year.  Take baby steps to stay on track with this priority whether by letting go and blessing others with things that are not used, or clarifying your commitments.

 

What are your priorities? What are your really important family moments?

ADD and Routines

/1 Comment/in , , , , , , /by

ADD and ADHD

 

For some of us, creating routines is natural and comfortable.  We love repetition and the sameness of routine.  However, some of us like spontaneity and the excitement of new and fresh!  Can there be a balance or a way to merge these two ideas?  With the challenges of ADHD, often there is a big void of routines.  It is unnatural and uncomfortable.   However, a few important small routines can make a difference.

  • Start with an awareness of how routines can make a difference for you. If you have ADD or ADHD,  think about how whether having one day established for a certain task might be helpful?  The time does not have to be rigid, but it should be compelling.   I suggest having one hour of administrative time once a week to catch up with tedious, required tasks.  Having a routine set for admin time, such as Sunday afternoon between nap and dinner, make certain that paper is acted on. A routine might be something that happens daily or weekly.  Laundry days can be every day in the morning or every Monday and Thursday.
  • Add on one simple, small step to an existing routine.  If you are already successful at a task, add on a related task as the next step in your routine.   It can be simply empty the trash in your car each time you get gas.  Toss the junk mail right after you put the kids to bed.
  • Add a partner to get a task finished.  You and your kids, spouse, or friend can fold and put away clothes, clean up the kitchen, or file and chat.
  • Give yourself permission and time to do a routine well.  If bill paying is the priority, that is all you need to accomplish in one day.   It is okay to accomplish one big job in a day.
  • Use a checklist to successfully begin a new routine.  Your checklist will prompt you visually with the steps in  your routine and you won’t have to rely on working memory. Your checklist will ensure completion too!  A checklist can be used at the beginning or end of the day and placed in a spot where you will see it regularly.
  • Don’t give up a routine easily.  It takes at least 3 weeks and up to 6 weeks to get a routine established.  Have tenacity and a compelling reason to keep your routine going.

What are routines that work well for you?  What is your “secret?”

ADD and Organizing

/0 Comments/in , , , , , /by

When I started my work 10 years ago, many of my clients were experiencing the same difficulties in getting organized, especially with paper.  It was hard for them to get started, work on their own, and most especially finish up and maintain their organization.   It was at that time that I realized the value of my work with clients with ADHD and ADD.

Working with clients with ADHD, I work as a partner with them, bringing energy, focus and resources to the mix.  Our work starts by narrowing where we will work.  Once defined, we work through the area to get to 100% , fitting their degree of order with their lifestyle.  As we work, we discuss the maintenance aspects of the space, talking through the how’s, why’s, and more of getting things back into order on a regular basis.

Here are a few tips for ADHD and organizing.

  • Start with a compelling reason with a deadline to get organized.  Wanting to be organized is sometimes not enough! Plan a party or invite a guest to stay at your home are scary but huge ways to get you moving!  This deadline will make you kick into gear but also keep you on track.   If you are a parent, wanting to model organizing, can be equally compelling. 
  • Work with a clutter buddy or paper partner, professional organizer or ADD coach.   Having a partner makes things happen! You have dates for accountability, fresh ideas flowing, and energy from your partner.
  • Start with a vision of what your space should look and feel like.  If you start with the end in mind, you will stay on track and get to your personal finish line.
  • Start small and focus on one step at a time.   You are already overwhelmed!  Working in one spot makes for success.  The hardest part is to keep from “zigzag organizing,” moving from room to room.  You start in one spot and just place sticky notes outside the door for the rooms you will be distributing items to or have a basket at the door that will collect item to distribute later. 

There are challenges for those with ADHD  or ADD and organizing.  It can be done!  I invite your posts on how this could help you get started or get finished on your organizing!

Distress and Disorganization

/2 Comments/in , , , , /by

It’s that anxious feeling you have when you are running late for an appointment and you can’t find your keys.  It’s that sinking feeling of depression while looking around your home, knowing you are overwhelmed by the disorder in different rooms.   It’s that stomach ache you have when you know you have to do your taxes, but you can’t find your forms or papers to fill in the amounts. It’s even that “discussion” you had with your husband about dinner or laundry and who is responsible for what at your home.  We live in a world of high expectations,  where guilt and shame underly our lack of organization.  When we want to connect, disorganization is a barrier to having company in our home.  Being disorganized causes all kinds of stress, whether it is physical, emotional or psychological. 

The first step in de-stressing is to take care of yourself.  It is usually the last thing we do! Taking care of yourself is assessing whether we had a good night’s sleep, ate a healthy breakfast and gave ourselves enough time to do a task to start with.  Take stock of all these aspects, putting your “own oxygen mask on first.”   This is the first area to attend to if we are to make a change and de-stress.

Make a plan and work your plan.   Take stock of what you do well and what you don’t.  Work from your strengths and make a plan of what you can get accomplished.   List your goals and priorities and see if you are aligning your daily commitments.  If not, it’s time to un-calendar some tasks.  If you “should” accomplish a task and find it is not a strength, create a team and delegate tasks.  Tasks may not be done the way you do it, but it will be done!  Write out your plan so you can see it daily,  including weekly routines with set days and times for certain tasks and open, untethered days to rejuvenate. 

Use tools that work for you.  In our world of technology, using your smart phone for your calendar and task list can make all the difference. Instead of keeping all the details in your head, get them out onto your calendar and task list so you are working high speed on what you need to accomplish. 

Disorganization and stress can be remedied with baby steps to change.  What ways are you working toward making a change?

Checklists

/4 Comments/in , /by

productivity and checklists

 

My motto is “why reinvent the wheel?”  There are lots of repetitive tasks and routines we do in our home and office, with our kids and our assistants.   Here are some ideas for check lists that make a difference.

Leave the house check list

  • Post this on your child’s mirror and at the back door
  • Include the “must have” items for the day, including homework,

Family routines check list

  • Post this on the refrigerator or where every one can see it
  • Include a column for each day of the week, and a row for each family member
  • In each block list the responsibilities for the day
  • Create partnerships so everyone works in pairs to get jobs done

Grocery Shopping Check List

  • Post on pantry door
  • Download your list from your favorite grocery store

Home maintenance check list

Work checklists

  • Pay the bills checklist
  • Make the deposits checklist
  • Assistant’s daily or weekly checklist
  • New employee checklist

General lists for smartphones

  • Evernote
  • Toodledo

Find lots more free checklists at www.familymanager.com! A plethra of checklists are available at www.listplanit.com!

Getting Dinner Done

/5 Comments/in , /by

organizing your dinner plan

 

One of my personal priorities is getting dinner done.  It is a great time for communication, cooperation and role modeling for our families.  It all starts with setting a time for your family to gather and getting dinner on the table.  There are several short cuts that can help.

Planning dinner

Having  a plan is the biggest part of getting dinner done.   The success factor for dinner means you have a plan that works for you.   Gather your family together for your family meeting and brainstorm 10 meals everyone will eat.  These can be very simple, including dinner for breakfast, sandwiches or simple assembly with pre-cooked ingredients.   Moms sometimes like to throw in “surprise night” so that you have the opportunity once a week to be creative.

My colleague Susan Heid recently added her own cookbook for sale. With the discount code of CP20, you can purchase it online at her website.   Susan includes making your lists and conversation starters too!

http://www.theconfidentmom.com/mom-resources/got-dinner-quick-easy-recipes-from-the-confident-mom/

Susan enthusiastically wears the hat of mom, step-mom and foster mom to 4 awesome kids – ages 18, 14, 10 and 14 months; is married to her very own prince charming, loves coffee, cloudy days, and does think the bluest skies you’ve ever seen are in Seattle. You can find her at her other day job, The Confident Mom and get a FREE copy of her popular eBook “Getting Kids to Cooperate and Become Team Players.”

Online resources for creativity include www.e-mealz.com and www.thescramble.com.  All of these boost your meal planning organization in different ways.  Choose what works for you to get the plan going!

One amazing way to make your family and husband VERY happy is to post the meals of the week! You will receive not only amazing compliments, lots of hugs too!

Planning shopping

One of the trickiest shopping is for groceries.  Everyone’s ideal is different, but most agree that have a way to capture the list, and getting to the store regularly, make for the easiest organization. You can google your store and print out the list of groceries by aisle and keep this on a clipboard near the pantry.  Having two days that are the “regular” shopping days make sure there is always milk in your home.

Planning cooking

At 4:30 your kids become aliens who were raised by wolves! Having a plan on when to cook is the last step in dinner planning.  You can set aside time on Sunday to double batch, you can start your dinner early in the crock pot before you leave for work, or  you can entertain your kids in the kitchen with you while cooking dinner.  You can mix it up with partnering, where you and one child cook one night, and your partner and another child do the dishes that night.  Delegating and cooperating are fun parts to cooking dinner and everyone can have a job.   All of these are great ways to have preparation time.  Know what works for you and set up your time accordingly.   For me, even without kids at my feet, I love to cook on Sundays and adore my crock pot!  My husband and I share the clean up responsibilities too.

What are your best ways to get dinner done?

Organizing your Teen

/0 Comments/in , , , /by

Organizing your teen might feel a lot like herding cats.  Are you really making a difference?  Approaching organizing can be overwhelming, distracted and extremely frustrating! But with a few tips, you can make organizing happen. 

Start by establishing a work plan that appeals to your teen.  Set a time that you can both work and require mandatory attendance. To work together, you need their input to know what to keep and what to eliminate. Set a time that your teen can really be on target in making decisions.  Work for 2 hour segments as well so you keep on task and get things done.

Help your teen establish a boundary for keepsakes.  Having attractive boxes for keepsakes and plastic 66 quart tubs for alternative storage make for great options.  There will be keepsakes for sure! Having these options gives your teen a boundary for how much to keep, helps them start making decisions, and also allows for safe storage. Attractive boxes can hold paper keepsakes, while storage bins hold models, dolls or other precious items they have outgrown but not out-loved.

Add energy to the project with food and music! Adding a professional organizer in the mix adds objectivity, focus and project management too!  In just two hours, here is what a mom, a teen and I knocked out in two hours over spring break!

What is your organizing challenge with your teen?

Family Calendar for Family Communication

/4 Comments/in , , , /by

family calendar and family organizing

 

It’s 5 pm and you are headed home from work! Who will be there when you get there? Where did they go if not?  What’s going on this weekend for you and your kids?

 

Its time for your family calendar.

Why use a family calendar?

We all know we live in a busy world. Being busy sometimes means we are not able to communicate as consistently or effectively as we need. Here comes the concept behind the family calendar.  It is the one spot where everyone’s activities are recorded and the connections created.  Having a family calendar posted where everyone can see it means that there is subliminal information being shared!  It works best when the family holds a weekly gathering to add information.  Don’t be deterred by trying to find a day and time to meet.  Set a time on the weekend, when there is a little more flexibility, and just be sure to hold your meeting each week.  If you are using a technology calendar, no problem! Simply print out the week or month at a glance and post it.  Now you have the best of all, an on the go calendar and one for everyone to see!

Great family calendars come in many forms

 

No matter how much or how little your family does, a calendar gives you a spot to see it all.  It’s easy to know goes where and when.

 

Tips for organizing families here!

Get ready for summer travel, camps and more!

/1 Comment/in , , , , /by

get ready for summer

 

 

Now is the perfect time to be planning your summer holidays.  Many families are choosing a stay-cation for spring break, taking time to catch up, do projects, and get in a little fun locally.  Get ready for the summer by choosing camps or other activities for your kids, planning an extended summer vacation or even preparing for local summer fun.

 

Start by corralling all those important summer dates and ideas.

When does school end? What events like family reunions or weddings are already planned? When is Vacation Bible School or Swim Team? When does school gear back up with activities like sports or dance?

Host a family meeting focusing on summer fun. What do your kids enjoy the most? What new adventures or activities would they like to try?  Where would you and your kids like to travel? Is there time for you and your spouse to have your own get-away?

 

Your approach gives you time to investigate some great online resources.

Check these out!

http://www.thefamilytravelfiles.com/

http://familytravelnetwork.com/

http://www.travelandleisure.com/vacation-ideas/family

If you are planning a summer stay-cation, check out this site.  http://www.visithoustontexas.com/

Our most beloved family vacation was at Yellowstone National Park.  http://www.us-national-parks.net/

 

Think about alternating busy weeks with low key weeks.

You and your family will feel less pressured in preparing and enjoy the vacation more.   It gives you time to prepare for each event and travel.  Kids need down time too!

 

Making early decisions on your summer plans can save you a bundle.

Once you have committed and paid, remember to keep a folder in your command center specifically for summer.  Move this into your filing cabinet at the end of the summer to keep a record for future trips.   As your summer plans get near, check online for coupons for activities and recreation in your vacation area.  There are lots of ways to save with internet resources.

 

What is your summer plan?  Need ideas?  Check out my Summer Fun pinterest board for great free ideas!

Last minute tax time tips

/3 Comments/in , /by

last minute tax preparation

 

If you are paralyzed about tax time, here are a few ways to get started and unstuck.

Items you can get off the internet if you don’t have the papers you need.

  • Use your year end credit card statements.   These are already categorized for taxes.
  • Go online to your mortgage company and download your mortgage expenses and property tax for your 1098.  Property taxes  and mortgage expenses are the biggest deductions in Texas.
  • Use your online pay stubs to find the taxes you paid on your final paycheck for 2010.
  • Visit your online banking and print statements out needed for income and expenses.

If you have papers, but are overwhelmed and not sure where to start.

  • Go through your papers and mail to find all the 1099s, 1098s and any other envelope marked important tax document on the outside of the envelope.
  • Spend one hour sorting income and expenses.  Spend 30 minutes sorting income into interest and dividends and then stocks for capital gains.  Spend another 30 minutes sorting medical into doctors/dentists, labs, eyeglasses, out of pocket and deductibles.    Spent another 30 minutes sorting charitable deductions.  Spend another 30 minutes using  ItsDeductibleonline.com to tabulate your charity non cash donations. Finalize with 30 minutes of wrap up.
  • Group your credit card and other receipts by categories for your small business, such as advertising, meals (with the name of who you worked with and the work you did written on the receipt), office supplies, mileage and educational expenses.

The hardest thing about taxes is getting started! Just do it, jump on it, get help with a professional or tax software, and you will be very glad you did!